The War on Empathy and Joy

How denying ourselves good feelings plays right into the hands of authoritarianism

Farewell snapshot from Dancing with Refugee Kids on Zoom

A couple of years ago, I wrote a piece on the war on empathy and its unsettling connection to authoritarianism: A 2019 study of nearly 1,000 Belgian students found that those with lower emotional intelligence were more likely to support authoritarian and socially dominant ideologies. The researchers suggested that a lack of empathy makes it harder to assume others' perspectives, limiting our capacity for connection, compassion, and collaboration. Empathy, in short, is a threat to authoritarianism because it fuels solidarity.

But lately I’ve noticed something concerning among deeply empathetic people: guilt. Guilt about feeling good when so much is broken and so many are suffering. On the surface, it seems noble. But refusing moments of joy or gratitude leads to body budget depletion, overwhelms our nervous systems, and ultimately diminishes our capacity to act. The result? Inaction that upholds the very status quo we oppose.

This is backed by research showing that happier people are more likely to take action on the social causes they care about. Joy fuels the courage to fight for what matters.

Yes, flaunting privilege is insensitive, and if joy is your only act of resistance, congratulations—you’re basically a scented candle in a burning house. But denying yourself joy can harm you and those who might need your wellbeing the most.

Joy is not indulgence; it’s sustainable fuel for the resistance.

So savor that deep breath. Feel the sun on your skin. Laugh when you can.

It’s how we stay human.
It’s how we keep going ❤️✨

I stopped Watching Movies and TV Shows

I work with refugees and underserved communities who’ve experienced immense trauma and injustice. To show up fully for this work, I also need to recover from vicarious trauma and protect against burnout.

One thing that helps: giving my eyes and nervous system a break. I’ve stopped watching shows and movies at night and take weekly device fasts. In case this helps you, too, check out the article.

The Art Effect: Neuroaesthetics and the Future of Health Equity

I wrote this because we need a dose of radical imagination in the face of all that’s broken. What if we challenged the traditional medical model—so often reduced to a doctor, a diagnosis, and a prescription—and instead advocated for a people-centered system that honors the full spectrum of wellbeing?

What if we built an infrastructure where wellbeing is not an individual burden but a collective priority? One that not only addresses inequities in access to holistic practices but also begins to repair the deep mistrust many marginalized communities feel toward the medical establishment? Here’s the article.

Culture Impact Lab

I’m honored to be giving several keynotes and workshops this late spring and summer and deeply moved by the opportunity to share space, stories, and practices that nourish resilience and joy. I’m especially excited to participate in the Culture Impact Lab in a few weeks in Chicago—a reminder that spaces like this still thrive. May we keep building and tending to more, in community.