How Is Your Heart?

Practicing the Art of Holding Suffering and Joy

2026 has arrived already heavy with devastation, especially for those of us who are, or have loved ones, in the crosshairs of state violence. There has been little space to recover between one blow and the next. With the accelerating dismantling of life-saving institutions, the bombing of Venezuela, the brutal kidnappings of many across the US, ongoing genocides in Palestine, Sudan, and Congo, and the murders of Keith Porter and Renee Good by ICE, it has been difficult to catch one’s breath. And then came Iran’s second uprising in three years, fueled by sanctions, crushing economic hardship, government corruption, and horrific regime violence against its own people. Seeing the same relentless tactics deployed against civilians across so many places recalls Tolstoy’s insight, revised for our time: all oppressive nations fail in the same way.

The crackdowns in Iran have been swift and appear more severe than ever, with death toll estimates in the thousands, though no one knows the exact number because of digital blackouts. I can’t reach my loved ones. I fear for every Iranian risking everything for freedom.

Amid all this, several friends reached out with a simple question: How is your heart?

Each time I opened my messages and saw that question, I teared up. Not only because it was perfectly asked by someone who knows me well, someone whose care made me feel deeply held, but because it gave me permission to pause and be tender with a heart that does so much heavy lifting. It allowed me to name both the pain I carry and the immense support and privilege that make healing possible.

When I pause and tune in, I realize my life’s work has always been about growing a bigger heart—one capable of holding immense suffering so I can remain of service to those who are hurting. This might be easier said than done, but I keep returning to the practices I teach:

I find myself turning, again and again, toward beauty and toward love, not to escape what is happening, but because refusing all beauty would be another kind of violence. I stay with what is alive and humming just long enough to replenish my body budget, to calm a nervous system worn thin by grief, and rebuild my inner reserves. From there, I can return to the world’s suffering with my full humanity intact.

I make space for a hundred small joys each day: one-minute breathing pauses, singing a few lines, moments of gratitude, hugging the people I love.

It was the life-affirming power of joy that helped me survive the soul-crushing reality of Iran without being crushed. And I continue to pivot to joy not as an escape, but as a strategy, one that steadies me amid suffering, stitches what’s been torn, and keeps carrying me toward repair.

If you haven’t yet listened to my TEDx Talk on the conditions under the Islamic Republic & how Iranians became radically resourceful while surviving both an actual war with Iraq and a regime-led war on joy, I’ll share it here👇🏾

Now I ask you: How is your heart?

• What has hardened it lately? And what might soften it without turning away?

• What grief are you holding? And what practices are helping you stay human in the face of it?

• What else is it carrying? And what does it need to stay open without breaking?

BBC Interview

BBC interviewed 2 other Iranian women and me. We all want liberation for Iran, but see different paths: One wants to bomb, one is skeptical about intervention, and I don’t trust anyone who kidnaps and kills their own people, crushes free speech, and facilitates genocide to suddenly care about Iranians.

Also, Western intervention helped put the current regime in power.

Here’s the link. Start on min 30:

This part was edited out:

US taxpayers spent abt $8 trillion on Iraq and Afghanistan intervention. The much more devastating cost was millions of innocent lives. In Afghanistan, after 20 years, we handed the country straight back to the Taliban, and people are suffering far worse today. I know this because I spent years working with Afghan women and children who survived it all.

​​Protesters on the ground have diverse opinions, just as the diaspora does. They’re not a monolith, and none of us speaks for all of them. The ones I’ve spoken with ask for solidarity, amplification, protecting channels for medicine and life-saving aid, and pressure on power structures, especially the armed forces, to break with the regime.

I was also asked for a comment on an analysis of the protests last Friday, and here’s what I said:

BBC asked me for a comment abt the situation in Iran & regime change and here's what I said:
My heart aches for my people—for everything they’ve endured and keep enduring & bc they deserve so much more than the false binary they’re being offered between a brutal Islamofascist dictatorship & a return to a monarchy that also brutalized countless Iranians.
No theocracy.
No western puppets.
Power to the people.
به امید آزادی

The full analysis can be accessed here.

Fundraiser for Gaza

Monday marked the first day of the January iteration of BEHIND THE BOOK SALE! For a limited time only, between now and January 16 at 11:59 pm PT, you can receive exclusive drafting, brainstorming, and/or supplemental book material from five amazing authors. All you have to do is make a donation of ANY amount, 100% of which will go to families in Gaza, and you’ll be emailed your selected author’s material. Authors participating are @jodipicoult, @paulgtremblay, @authorshaylingandhi, @vkelleyart, and @rumiwithaview.

How it works:
1. Send a donation of ANY amount to username megancollinswriter on Venmo or PayPal, using the memo “[your email] + [author whose material you want]”
2. If you want more than one item, please make an additional donation of ANY amount, following the same instructions as above.
3. If you don’t have Venmo or PayPal but would still like to buy an item, email megancollinswriter @ gmail dot com.
4. Material will be emailed to you ASAP, and no later than five days after your donation.

Donations will be split between two young people in Gaza responsible for providing for their families—@ahmedfgaza, who has four siblings and a disabled father and is in need of food and winter clothing, and @diana.moneer, who needs ongoing medical treatment for her mother’s breast cancer, as well as food, winter supplies, and treatment for her own health issues.

به امید آزادی